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Lakewood Redux

In a letter to the editor in this week's Jewish Press, a resident of Lakewood, New Jersey credits the community's rabbis for their actions in the recent controversy relating to school admissions:

Having relocated from a “Brooklyn outpost” to the town of Lakewood, New Jersey, I must say the move was quite hard at first. Nothing could adequately prepare me for living in such an insular community. My inches of exposed hair seemed to stick out for miles, as did the slit in my skirt, my sandals, and my uncovered feet. I could hardly believe different standards of dress could matter so much among fellow Jews.

The neighbors were wary of allowing our children to play together, as if owning video games were a bigger sin than speaking lashon hara. When I offered to lend our Sesame Street DVD to a neighbor, I was viewed as an alien who had just landed from outer space. And that is exactly how I felt. After all this, the prospect of getting my child into school was one that I dreaded.

How pleasantly surprised I was. I will admit we were given quite the run-around, especially after our “iniquity” of actually having a computer with Internet connection (with parental controls) was discovered. But just when I had reached the end of my rope, the rabbis of Lakewood taught us all a lesson in inclusion and tolerance.

Tackling the school enrollment problem head on, the rabbis of the Lakewood Yeshiva displayed courage and tenacity rarely witnessed even in good old New York City. No school was allowed to open its doors until every single Jewish girl in Lakewood was guaranteed a place. In this most ultra-Orthodox of communities, incredible achdus was displayed as girls who love the “American Idol” were placed alongside girls who love the kollel ideal. Nothing mattered other than ensuring a quality Jewish education for all.

I just want to thank all those involved and give credit where it’s due. If we would all learn from the Lakewood rabbis’ acceptance, tolerance and ahavas chinam, surely Mashiach would be here soon. Until then, feel free to join me here. Believe it or not, we have restaurants and salons — even parks and pools. There is actually a 24/6 Jewish radio station, with the Lakewood Yeshiva a proud sponsor. And best of all, you can pick up The Jewish Press at a growing number of shops around town.

Ahuva Fleischman
Lakewood, NJ

This letter leaves me with mixed feelings. On the negative side, clearly, Mrs. Fleischman had a hard time getting her child into school, and has been treated poorly by the dominant charedi majority in Lakewood. On the other hand, for the most part, her letter does support those with a positive stance toward the Lakewood rabbis, in contrast to my recent posts that criticized those rabbis for what I saw as their timid and respectful stance toward the schools in question. That's a good thing, though I wonder to what extent Mrs. Fleischman's sentiments have arisen from low expectations based upon her experiences in Brooklyn and Lakewood.
posted on 9/28/2005