The Zionist Conspiracy

A clandestine undertaking on behalf of Israel, the Jets and the Jews.

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Tuesday, January 29, 2008
The Calm Before The Storms

UPDATE: 4:20 P.M.: 15 minutes after this post went up, the Mets and Twins have agreed to terms on a trade for Johan Santana.

UPDATE 2: 5:20 P.M.: I have purchased a Mets Sunday ticket plan. I must be excited about the Santana trade.

Even without the excitement and controversy of Orthodox vacation week, alot's going on. The final Winograd report will be released tomorrow, the Johan Santana saga appears near the end, the presidential primaries remain tight, Jason Kidd has finally admitted that he wants out of New Jersey, there's a big football game scheduled for Sunday evening, and The Jewish Press is set to publish an explosive front page piece asking whether observant Jews should be sports fans, and if so, whether it is muttar to be a Jets fan.

Speculation is probably a waste of time, so I'll speculate just a little:

-Winograd will be more harsh than recent media leaks suggest.

-Kidd will make himself more and more of a nuisance. He will be traded but won't win a championship.

-The Mets will give up more than expected for Santana, and after he signs a six-year $132 million extension, Omar Minaya will have little payroll flexibility and the Mets will still be stuck with the same manager and bullpen.

-It will ultimately be Obama and McCain.

-In Woodmere, MoC will be feted for his thoughtful approach to the role of sports.

-In Atlanta and Baltimore, Jews will celebrate the inclusion of their favorite sons in a Jewish weekly published in New York.

-In Brooklyn, G-d fearing yeshiva students will demand that an article about sports be retracted, lest it lead them to improper temptations. They will be told, "this is not B'nei Brak." A letter calling for the boycott of a blog with the word "Zionist" in it will be released in Hebrew, and translated into a grammatically-challenged form of English. Yated readers will express their outrage.

-Patriots 31 Giants 20.